Characterization < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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| Aufgabe | Mr. Willison is one main character in the story "manhood" written by John Wain, having with his son a bicycle tour ( cf. ll. 1ff.)
On the one hand he seems to be physical strenght, because he didnt need a long rest as his son (cf. ll. 42f.), who wants to get an athletic, but in the other hand he sais nothing about his conditional position, so he coul be very tired bur to proud to being tired.
Furthermore he is very inconsiderate, in other words he takes no responsibility on his son, because if he had taken responsibility, he wouldnt have want to make a very short rest(cf. ll. 42ff.), for example his son could break down. Additionaly his sense of hounor is big, because he wants to get home at one o clock(cf. l. 49f.). COnsequently his ambition of doing something organizes is big, too.
All in all is Mr. Willison a man, who knows waht to do and how to do. |
so, könntet ihr das bitte nach grammatischen fehlern korrigieren und vllt verbessern? :D waer nett :]
danke,
carsten
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(Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig  | | Datum: | 14:24 Fr 03.11.2006 | | Autor: | mafutrct |
Ich weiß nicht, ob es noch von Belang ist, dennoch hier mal eine versuchte Korrektur. Ich übernehme keine Garantie 
Ich habe meine Veränderungen jeweils in [] gefasst, so dass du den Unterschied zum quelltext sofort siehst. Bei Stellen, an denen ich entweder unsicher war oder dringend etwas anderes verwenden würde, habe ich ein '?' angehängt.
Mr. Willison is one [a?] main character in the story "manhood" [Manhood?] written by John Wain, having a bicycle tour [with his son]( cf. ll. 1ff.)
On the one hand he seems to be physical[ly] strenght [strong], because he didnt [did not] need a long rest as his son (cf. ll. 42f.), [kein Komma, es sei denn, er wird von mehreren Söhnen begleitet] who wants to get an athletic [athlete], [kein Komma] but in [on] the other hand he sais [says] nothing about his conditional position [irreführend. besser schlicht: his condition], so he coul [could] be very tired bur [but be] to proud to being tired. [besser: to proud to show (it).]
Furthermore he is very inconsiderate, in other words he takes no responsibility on ["on"?] his son, [kein Komma] because if he had taken responsibility, he wouldnt [would not] have [kein 'have'] want to make ["make" klingt nicht so toll] a very short rest (cf. ll. 42ff.), [würde hier neuen Satz beginnen] for example [e.g.] his son could break down [collapse?]. Additionaly [,?] his sense of hounor [honor] is big, because he wants to get home at one o clock(cf. l. 49f.). Consequently his ambition of doing something organizes is big [versteh ich nicht. meintest du his ambition of organizing (things) is big [huge/immense?], too.
All in all Mr. Willison [is] a man, who knows waht [what] to do and how to do [it?].
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