Letter to the editor < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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(Frage) beantwortet  | | Datum: | 20:44 Di 19.02.2008 | | Autor: | Julika |
| Aufgabe | | Ich bitte um eine Korrektur meines "Letter to the editor", (jedoch habe ich hier alles förmliche weggelassen, nur der Textteil zählt). |
Sir,
As a subscriber to Newsweek I came across the article Video Games Normalize Killing, Doctors Say in the issue of February 7, 2008, in which the problem of violent video games is discussed.
After carefully studying this article, I do not hesitate to clearly voice my scepticism about some of the arguments. Without much hesitation I confess, I am an 18 year old girl and I play these devilish video games, too. That is just why I absolutely have to react to this article. It is true that I can only speak of myself and there are surely persons, who behave in an other way, but I just can say that these shooting games did not change my character or personality in any way. Neither the addressed isolation or the mentioned anti-social behavior my fellows noticed on myself, I did not change. Additionally I do not feel ready or rather incited to be violent or use violence for my own pleasure or advantage, just because of the games. In this sense I just can agree to the remark: No one can prove a definitive link between virtual violence and the real thing.. Confirmed by the arguments every player of shooting games would have to use force, glorify or even adore it! However, nobody bears the fact in mind that these games are just played as an activity in kids leisure time. Maybe they actually might be useful for reducing aggressions, stress and frustration, but this is also better than venting aggressions indiscriminately on innocent persons in the REAL life. And even if I am done playing, there are other thoughts on my mind than just even if it might be a logical conclusion for all those who condemn the shooting games - Kill. Kill. Kill..
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(Antwort) fertig  | | Datum: | 21:21 Di 19.02.2008 | | Autor: | rainerS |
Hallo!
> Ich bitte um eine Korrektur meines "Letter to the editor",
> (jedoch habe ich hier alles förmliche weggelassen, nur der
> Textteil zählt).
Der Text gefällt mir gut. Ich habe ein paar kleine Fehler korrigiert und einige Ausdrücke markiert, die ich anders schreiben würde. Kannst dir ja überlegen, ob sie dir besser gefallen als dein Original!
> Sir,
>
> As a subscriber to Newsweek I came across the article
> Video Games Normalize Killing, Doctors Say in the issue
> of February 7, 2008, in which the problem of violent video
> games is discussed.
> After carefully studying this article, I do not hesitate to
> clearly voice my scepticism aboutdoubts concerning some of the arguments.
> Without much hesitation I confess, I am an 18 year old girl
> and I play these devilish video games, too. That is just
> why I absolutely have to react to this article. It is true
> that I can only speak offor myself and there are surely
> persons, who behave in another way, but I just can definitely say
> that these shooting games did not change my character or
> personality in any way. Neither the addressed isolation or
> the mentioned anti-social behavior
Hier bin ich mir nicht sicher, wie du das am besten ausdrücken kannst: es ist gut, den Satz so zu beginnen, um die Betonung auf "isolation or ... " zu legen, aber dann musst du im Passiv weitermachen, zum Beispiel:
were observed by my friends,
> according to my friendsmy fellows noticed on
> myself, I did not change. Additionally I do not feel ready
> or rather incited to be violent or use violence for my own
> pleasure or advantage, just because of the games. In this
> sense I just can only agree towith the remark: No one can prove a
> definitive link between virtual violence and the real
> thing.. Confirmed by Following the arguments put forward in the article every player of
> shooting games would have to use force, glorify or even
> adore it! However, nobody bears the fact in mind that these
> games are just played as an activity in kids leisure time.
> Maybe they actually might be useful for reducing
> aggressions, stress and frustration, but this is also
> better than venting aggressions indiscriminately on
> innocent persons in the REAL life. And even if I am done
> playing, there are other thoughts on my mind than just
> even if it might be a logical conclusion for all those who
> condemn the shooting games - Kill. Kill. Kill..
>
Viele Grüße
Rainer
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