Text geschrieben < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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(Antwort) fertig | Datum: | 18:53 Mo 01.03.2010 | Autor: | leduart |
Hallo
Da du schon im deutschen Text so viele Flüchtigkeits und Tipfehler hast, werd ich das erst ansehen, wenn du wenigstens die aus dem engl. Text entfernt hast.
Achte besonders auf Verformen!
Gruss leduart
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(Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig | Datum: | 18:58 Mo 01.03.2010 | Autor: | lalalove |
Ich glaube ich hab keine Rechtschreibfehler mehr drinne,
das "I" immer groß geschrieben.
Bei den Verben hab ich glaub ich auch keine Fehler!
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(Antwort) fertig | Datum: | 19:29 Mo 01.03.2010 | Autor: | mmhkt |
Guten Abend,
na, das ging aber schnell nach leduarts Anmerkung...
Einige Anmerkungen ohne den Anspruch auf Vollständigkeit:
> When one of the campers asked me: "what'd you do?" for
> sending to camp green lake, I answered: "I stole a pair of
> sneakers from Clyde Livingston."
Wenn das eine Art Straflager sein soll, scheint mir der Begriff "camper" nicht ganz passend.
M.E. wäre auch "[...]for being sent to[...]" die bessere Formulierung.
Schöner wäre auch "what did" statt deiner Kurzform.
> The others boys dont didn't believed me and laugthed.
> It was kind of funny in a way I thought.
> But if (eher: "when") I remember how Clyde also came to the court, I'm
> very angry and disappointed because of his words: "They (m.E. passte hier "that" besser) were
> my sneakers and I had donated them to help raise money for
> the homeless shelter.
> I can't imagine what kind of horrible person you are, that
> you steal from homeless children!".
> That was the worst part for me, Clyde Livingston, my sports
> hero thought that I'm a no-good-dirty-rotten thief. I felt
> so bad.
> And I couldn't tell him the truth! Nobody believed me, and
> nobody would believe me..
> What had actually happened was that I had missed the bus
> home from school because a boy named Derrick Dunne, who was
> smaller than me, had taken my notebook and dropped it in
> the toilet in the boy’s (hier muss das Apostroph hinter "boys" weil es ja die Gesamtheit der Jungs, also Mehrzahl, betrifft) bathroom.
> He was ignoble! So I had to walk home. On my way home, the
> sneakers fell from the sky and hit me on the head. Its hurt
> a lot. I dont knew didn't know that they belongs to Livingston. I just
> knew the sneakers smelled horribly and that they
> represented my destiny. It had to be more than a
> coincidence that my father was working with old sneakers
> and a pair of old sneakers fell on me. But I was arrested
> quickly but my trial did not come for several months
> because of baseball season. (der Zusammenhang erschließt sich mir nicht so ganz. Warum soll es keine Verhandlung geben, nur weil die BB-Saison läuft?) I told the truth in court but,
> of course, no one believed that sneakers could fall from
> the sky. And I no longer believed the sneakers were
> “destiny’s shoes.”
> I was cursed by my
> no-good-dirty-rotten-pig-stealing-great-great-grandfather.
> However, i was judged. Jugded for my innocence, for true
> words..
Wenn Du "verurteilt" meinst, dann eher "sentenced" benutzen.
Soweit meine Vorschläge.
Schönen Abend
mmhkt
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(Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig | Datum: | 03:20 Di 02.03.2010 | Autor: | matux |
$MATUXTEXT(ueberfaellige_frage)
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